Is it Wrong?

Should I worried that people found my blog yesterday by Googling these search terms?

• “my many sexual experiences”
• “Life pain in the ass”
• “Is it my fault she left”
• “I think my daughter is possessed”

Anyone?

By the way, if you’re interested in what Little One has been doing the last two days, you can read about Tuesday here (want to guess which character she plays?) and Wednesday here. I’m so sorry, teachers. Go home and get some rest.

Only Eight Things?

Mary over at Motherwise Cracks has tagged me for a meme on eight little or unknown things about me. Only eight? Geez, which things should I share?

 1. I played the clarinet in Junior High/High School band for six years without fully learning how to read music. I think I missed something early on in band class and was never able to learn it; I learned to play all the music by ear.

2. I eat weird things for breakfast. This morning I had quinoa with raisins, onions, and almonds. Sometimes it’s parsnips, or frozen Lean Cuisine pizza, or sushi, or potato salad.

3. I have a phobia about earthworms. When I was a little kid I went fishing with my dad, and he had me carry the worm bucket. The worms started to crawl up the side of the bucket and toward my hand, and I do believe my brain exploded right out of my skull. Now I’ve overcome this problem so that I can garden, but I avoid looking at or touching any worms. While trying not to gag.

4. I have really bizarre, vivid dreams about things like radioactive cats and man-eating vines. For most of my life I’ve dreamed dozens of recurring dreams, such as Whitewater Rafting with My Sister, Living in the Haunted House (There’s a Mad Relative Locked in the Attic, or The Basement Is Possessed by Demons), Forgetting to Feed the Fish (Until They Turn Cannibal, Eat Each Other, and Then Escape the Fish Tank), and Learning to Levitate With My Mind. In fact, some of these recurring dreams are so familiar that my mind has apparently created whole cities for them. They resemble real places like St. Joseph, Michigan and North Chicago, Illinois, but have their own streets and buildings that are the same in each dream. Hmmm, is this kind of a freaky fact?

5. I’m a history and mythology fan. There was a Norse mythology smackdown at my Cinco de Mayo party last spring when one of my friends mentioned in passing that Loki was the foster brother of Thor. I whipped out my reference book and proved him wrong. Oh foolish mortal.

6. When I was ten years old, I helped my parents built a house with their own hands. We had a contractor dig the basement and frame it, and we did all the rest. Plumbing, electrical, cedar siding, insulation, roofing, etc. It took us a year but we never completely finished the house – there were still sheetrock walls and construction steps to the basement when we moved out.

7. I feel horrible guilt at killing even a bug or a spider. I’m not afraid of them, and the guilt of snuffing out their lives eats away at me, so I just leave them for someone else to deal with. Last winter Little One found a ladybug still alive in our kitchen, and I had to leave the room when she flung it out into a blizzard. I don’t like to dwell on that murder. I don’t know, maybe it lived somehow.

8. I like to listen to disco music when I clean the house. Especially Abba.

So now I tag eight others to share their little-known facts. I pick Mom and More, Iguana Banana, Hope is Power, Swishy, Navel Gazing, I Hate Laundry, Welcome to the Patti-O, and Ninja Poodles. I’ll be tagging them shortly, so visit their sites and learn more about them!

Must be love.

Big Guy: You’re wearing my jacket.

Me: What’s yours is mine, honey.

BG: I don’t understand these marriage economics yet.

Me: Which ones? The ones where a teenage daughter equals an empty wallet?

BG: The whole thing. The University of Illinois has a respected economics department. I studied business for years. I still don’t understand marriage economics.

Me: Maybe you skipped a few classes.

BG: Mmmmhh.

Me: This jacket is much softer than the other one I borrowed. Did you just roll your eyes at me? You weren’t wearing it. How many jackets can you wear at once, anyway?

BG: It’s mine. MINE!

Last weekend I asked him, “When you were a teenager, did you ever think someday you’d be spending your Friday night in a Walgreens pharmacy line getting medicine for your stepdaughter, and listening to Rush’s ‘Tom Sawyer’ on the store speakers?”

On the other hand, I never thought I would spend a Friday night helping at a Rotary Club bingo game during “Village Days”. At forty, I was the second youngest person in the bingo tent. You can imagine how willingly I went. Good thing I love that big guy.