You are currently browsing the category archive for the 'Life With the Big Guy' category.
Because in the middle of the night, he’ll twine his fingers around mine and kiss my shoulder in his sleep.
Just FYI, this infection is knocking me out. I may need Last Rites. I suggested to Little One that it is really a tumor, but she doesn’t believe me. She’ll be sorry when I’m gone. P.S. She’s back at home. Today.
I’m going back to bed.
“I’m going to the store to pick up coffee. Need anything else?” I asked Big Guy.
“No no no. I’ll pick some up at the church. The senior ladies are selling Fair Trade coffee there.”
Cool. That was about 5 days ago. Several times since then I have mentioned that the coffee supply is running low and that state of affairs is disturbing to me. Yesterday when I spooned the last of the coffee into the coffeemaker, I mentioned this fact yet again. I am a witness to the fact that he entered a reminder into his palm phone. I imagined that this meant the situation was taken care of and I did not have to worry any further.
This morning I came down to a completely coffee-less kitchen. Big Guy looked a little shame-faced. “There’s some decaf,” he suggested.
I made a totally superior scoffing noise at the very idea of wasting my time drinking decaf, the effect of which was ruined when I inhaled a little saliva and started coughing. I considered pointing out how I was completely willing to purchase coffee yet he promised and even set a reminder to get coffee yesterday, and still we were completely bereft of fully-caffeinated coffee.
Then I remembered.
Yesterday morning the staff came to the church to find that someone had ransacked the building, stolen some equipment, trashed the offices, tossed food around the kitchens, and smashed the doorlocks. The police believe that while we were in worship band rehearsal Tuesday night, the vandal snuck into the building and hid out until our practice ended at ten, then went on his rampage.
Thank goodness, the weekend donations had already been deposited at the bank, and the thief didn’t find the key to the safe where Joe keeps cash and gift cards for the needy who come to him for help. The church staff spent the rest of the day cleaning up the building and wiping away the black powder that the police use to dust for fingerprints.
Apparently, during all that hubbub, Big Guy forgot to pick up a bag of caffeinated Fair Trade coffee. And when I remembered all that, I felt pretty shallow.
“Would you like a cup of tea?” I asked, and gave him a big smile.
*see, I can say an f-word.
You know you’re an old married couple when all the kids will be gone for hours and you use that time to go grocery shopping and make turkey stock. Oh, and maybe check a blog or two.
We recently acquired a gorgeous red-and-gold antique chair for our bedroom and welcomed it into our family. I got the idea that we should make a checklist of all the love spots in our home and go over them again to make sure we’ve covered everything. Big Guy is worried that if I blog about such things, our friends will no longer want to come over for dinner. I want to reassure everyone that all eating surfaces in our house are virgins and completely CLEAN, not that it matters because none of my friends read this blog, only my Mom. And she would probably cheer, because as soon as I got married she asked me how my love life was, and then said, “I always hoped my daughters would have fantastic sex lives.”
My girls don’t read this blog either, but just for the record their bedrooms are equally off-limits, because that’s just nasty.
Aaaaannnnnyway, Big Guy has also suggested that I don’t use the f-word on my blog. No talking about frogs. Or forks. Or February. But I just want to assure my church friends that, although the f-word was an integral part of my teen vocabulary, I only use it now when someone drops a refrigerator on my foot, or when the laptop eats a key chapter of my novel.
P.S. The Ministry Director DOES suggest that you check out his Chiles en Nogada recipe in the “Eat At Joe’s” section of this blog. And if you’re thirsty, check out the beer recommendation in “Drink Me”.
