In a few weeks, my pastor and friend of 14 years is leaving our church for new opportunities. I’m grieving.

Fourteen years ago, I started attending my church after 10 years of running away from organized religion. I wanted to experience a true relationship with God, not a ritual. I was a scared lil’ girl trying to extricate myself from an abusive relationship, and when I went to John for help, he and his wife Peggy let me and my little girls live with them until I got back on my feet.

Over the years, our two families have shared baptisms, weddings, bible studies, faith and pain and dinner dates. I know we’ll still be friends, but I also know that it won’t be the same, and I’m sad for that.

I could tell you that I’m not good at goodbyes, but I don’t think that captures the full flavor of  my grief. If you could imagine me flinging myself on the floor, wrapping my arms around their ankles and moaning, “Don’t go…don’t go…”, I think you might have a better picture of my pain.

Have you ever lost a spiritual leader and friend in these circumstances? What was your transition like? How did God help you during that time?